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If you use latex condoms, use a silicone or water-based lube like Sliquid Sassy or Uberlube — oil-based lubes degrade the integrity of the condom and create microscopic holes. Whether you’re using it alone or with a partner, throw a new condom on that bad boy every time it’s about to touch a new person — specifically a latex, polyurethane, or polyisoprene condom. "You can also get a yeast infection, bacterial vaginosis, or urinary tract infection from a sex toy," says Stubbs. While there’s been no research on the topic, STIs that spread through skin-to-skin or genital-to-genital contact can also be spread via a sex toy.

That FOMO you describe will be with you, regardless of which path you take, until you tackle where the FOMO is coming from itself. The transparency you want to proceed with requires introspection on your end about these subjects. From there, it might take some time (or it might happen on your first date) to find someone who is as open to discussing the details of sex and dating desires as you are. Safer dating guidelines include letting a trusted friend know where you are, who you’re with, and when to expect to hear from you. If you go to their home or a hotel, let your trusted friend know about the change in location and keep track of where your belongings are in case you need to grab your purse and shoes and exit quickly. There are dating sites and apps that attract people who are looking for, or even simply open to, the kind of casual sex you say you’re looking for.

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